A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “FELT CASTLES”

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “FELT CASTLES”
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FELT CASTLES

by John Yeo

   Rampaging across the continent the raiders laid waste to everything they came across, in their greedy lust for riches and power. The fearsome young leader was afraid of nothing and rose to every challenge that came his way. Tyrion had recently become the supreme leader after challenging, defeating, and dethroning the previous leader. Tyrion was fearless, Lord of all the valleys and sub-kingdoms that made up the Southern half of the continent of Grevillea. Tyrion’s relentless atrocities continued Northwards ruthlessly conquering and ransacking everything in his path.

    The powerful army of raiders had taken up residence in a valley that contained an impregnable castle. Tyrion felt secure and rested for a while to take stock of his kingdom. He sent out emissaries to contact his lords in residence in the conquered lands he ruled over, to demand funds by way of heavy taxes on the populations. One by one, these powerful lords arrived with gifts of much gold, silver and precious jewels.

     A stranger from the north rode into the castle that day, amidst these lords, on a pure white stallion, leading a mule train loaded with many bales of a soft material. A gentle unarmed man approached the guards and requested an audience with Tyrion.

   The aggressive captain of the guard immediately arrested him and he was dragged before the leader.

       “Who are you and where do you hail from?” Tyrion immediately asked the man, now in chains to prevent his escape.

       “Sir! My name is Santana, I come from Pacifica, a peaceful valley in the North. We have heard much about you and we would like to trade peacefully with you. We have much to offer and I am sure we could learn much from each other. We are a very peaceful people.”

      Tyrion smiled benevolently and thought long and hard before replying. “What is to stop us from overrunning your peaceful community taking whatever we want?”

       Santana said few words in reply, “Why? Everything we have is yours for the taking without bloodshed.”

      Tyrion said.  “What have you brought on your mule train?”

     “A luxurious new mysterious material that we use to construct our dwellings, very lightweight and very strong and waterproof. I would like to show your men how to construct portable castles to keep you safe wherever you go.” Replied Santana.

  Tyrion ordered his release at once and before long many portable castles covered the plains surrounding the castle.

   More mule trains had continually arrived, bearing the wondrous new material, and several days later most of Tyrion’s army were housed in comfort.

   Tyrion then ordered his army to prepare to march on Pacifica the next day, laughingly he prepared for an easy conquest.

      Santana was shocked, “Why?”  he asked, “We are your friends a very gentle peaceful people!”

       Tyrion laughed and relied, “I need the money to continue to fight and conquer.”

     That night all was prepared and the army slept comfortably and peacefully before the morning’s march on Pacifica.

    Then fire broke out around the castle a raging inferno spread widely and raged out of control from castle to castle. There was no escape from the flames. Thousands died, the only survivors were inside the impregnable castle. Then an iron clad army surrounded the valley and wiped out the few survivors, before they marched through the gates that were opened from within.

      Tyrion’s guards were killed and he was dragged before Santana.

          “How?” He begged as he was forced on his knees

       Taking a double edged sword Santana smiled and said. “This is the iron fist inside a velvet glove! Exacting justice for your ruthless killing.”

    Then with one blow Santana cut off the tyrant’s head.

Copyright  © Written by John Yeo ~ All rights reserved.

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “RENTAL IDENTITY”

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “RENTAL IDENTITY”
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RENTED IDENTITY,

by John Yeo

“I want it to be an unbreakable transformation. An identity that is so secure that even my own Mother would not be able to recognise me. Is that possible?”

 The identity broker smiled benevolently and replied.

“Of course Sir! Anything is possible if the funds are available. We have experts in dialect who can alter the way you pronounce words. We’ve got surgeons who can alter your appearance in many ways. Psychologists who can change your learned behaviour and characteristics. We also have a revolutionary new treatment that takes the essence of your being and reshapes your body.”

  “What are your prices?”

“Well Sir,  prices vary accordingly. Our popular identity rental is very reasonable, a fixed rental price is agreed for the life of the identity, and should a reversion procedure be required, we just charge a payment for the restoration treatment.

 A permanent identity change is of course possible. For an irreversible procedure a non-refundable fee is required.

Then there is our revolutionary new one-off treatment, where we guarantee an unidentifiable result.

A fluid dynamic chemical ooze of a variation of different identities that merge together in total integration. The previous personality takes over control and finally controls the identity of the whole. A higher power intervenes and takes control.”  replied the broker.

 “What if something goes wrong?”

  “My good friend, we have been trading from time immemorial. We have a full money back guarantee, if you are not completely satisfied.”

With an air of total reassurance, the broker pulled a catalogue from a bureau full of glowing testimonials from unidentifiable previous customers.

“These testimonials are from unidentifiable people, Mr Broker! How do I know they are genuine?”

 “My friend surely this is proof of our procedures the final results are unidentifiable. These are satisfied rental customers who have ongoing aftercare built into the contract.”

  “I may try the revolutionary agreement. I have a question, If I go for your top procedure, where do the personalities in the fluid dynamic chemical ooze come from?”

   “Thank you Sir, you will not be disappointed if you join our roll of honourable identity transformations.”

   “You didn’t answer my question, Mr Broker where does the ooze form and from whose personality?”

  “This is confidential information my friend, on both sides of the dividing line. Have no fear there will be no sudden surprises. Sign here for a new life and a new you. Well done you will not be disappointed! Step into this transformation unit and I will be back shortly to start things at once.”

There was a strange gurgling sound as the door to the unit closed behind him. He suddenly realised where the oozing personalities were from, as he began to feel himself drawn into a primeval chemical soup.

Copyright © Written by John Yeo ~ All rights reserved.

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “TIME TORTURE”

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “TIME TORTURE”
Posted on 16th March 2016 by John Yeo
A prompt response for Inspiration  Monday

Inspiration Monday: Time Torture

TIME TORTURE

by John Yeo

      The very learned judge adjusted his cap and addressed the prisoner in the dock.

 “You have been convicted of a very serious crime. My instincts are to sentence you to the ultimate sentence. However I intend to sentence you to one day’s imprisonment in the new psychological institution, where you will be re-educated and pay for your crimes. You will be considered for release at the end of the day’s sentence. That will be all!”

  There was a general gasp of surprise from the people in the courtroom.

  The prisoner smiled, then laughed out loud. “Thank you Judge! I will be eternally grateful to you for your consideration, and I look forward to seeing you again tomorrow.” He guffawed loudly as he was led away to the cells.

   George Sweeney had battered a Post office clerk to death in the process of committing an armed robbery. He was a career criminal and had no remorse or conscience whatsoever.

   He smiled as he was driven to a brightly lit hospital the next day to begin his sentence.     The doctors were calm and reassuring as they showed him to his quarters, the bright lights were continually on at all times.

   George ate a hearty meal and asked the orderly. “Can I see the Doctor in charge please, I would like to know what time my re-education begins.”

    The orderly smiled and replied. “Don’t worry, Mr Sweeney, you will see him soon, there will be plenty of opportunities as the day progresses.”

   George then said. “Can I have my watch back, it was removed from my wrist by the police, when I was arrested. There are no clocks here! What is the time right now?”

    “Clocks are irrelevant here!” Replied the orderly. “You will get used to our system of time. Time that is stretched out and manipulated to allow you to think your thoughts and redress your balance. Enjoy the feeling of eternity as the day progresses and you will achieve much re-education and reorientation.”

    George began to feel anxious when he heard this. “What do you mean? I am only here for a day, how can I achieve anything? What do you mean by stretching time? I demand to see the Doctor in charge right now!”

   The orderly grinned and said, “Yes of course. I will go and fetch someone. I will be back soon.”

   What seemed like hours passed as George waited and waited. He began calling out loudly to attract attention, banging on the walls and kicking the locked door. A small aperture in the wall held a lift-shaft where food was suddenly delivered, George then realised how hungry he was and wolfed the food down.

  He became disorientated as the bright lights were on and blazing. He slept and woke as the Doctor arrived accompanied by several nurses and the orderly.

   “Hello!” said the Doctor smiling. “How are you?  What can I do for you? We have a long day ahead.”

   “I don’t believe you!” George shouted! “I have been here for what seems like forever already. I demand to see a lawyer and I want my watch back!”

   “Yes Mr Sweeney, here is your watch.”

  George took the watch and suddenly realised it wasn’t working. “Hey! My watch is broken! It has been damaged! I demand to see someone from the police to report this crime!”

   “Of course, Mr Sweeney, I will arrange that for you. Now relax and enjoy the rest of your day here.”

   The doctor and his retinue then left.

 What seemed to George like an eternity passed as he was left alone in his quarters with food appearing at odd hours and the orderly checking on him changing faces through the window in the door. The lights blazed interminably as George suddenly became aware that this was to be a never ending day. He became even more disoriented when he finally began to realise there would be no remission on this stretched out day’s sentence.

Copyright © ~ Written by John Yeo ~ All rights reserved

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “ROYALS ON STRIKE”

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “ROYALS ON STRIKE”
Posted on 29th February 2016 by John Yeo
A prompt response for Inspiration  Monday

Inspiration Monday: Royals on Strike

A RIGHT ROYAL TURN-UP

by John Yeo

     “They’re on strike!” Said the PM to the Lord Chancellor, “We will have to go abroad and bring someone in to get the new Canned Beans factory officially opened properly.”

   “Oh God no! What is the problem?” Asked the Lord Chancellor adjusting his wig.

   “Since we have got rid of the Royal Yacht and provided oars for them, they seem to be worn out, even though they only use the canals and there is no tidal motion.”  said the PM. “That reminds me, I have asked the King of Tonga, to launch our new aircraft carrier for us, He has agreed but the consideration into the Tongan economy is immense.”

 “Can’t  we get someone else who will do it cheaper?”  asked the Chancellor of the Exchequer.

  “No! Most of the European monarchs are out on strike in sympathy, with our Royals. The Labour Party are backing them up, there is talk of a General Strike in support of our poor hard done by Royals.” Replied the PM.

    “I have heard that the savings from the withdrawal of the Royal train were rapidly squandered on helicopters. It’s a disgrace, they were actually nipping down to pick their daily papers up by helicopter. A journey of about a mile each way.”  Exclaimed the Chancellor of  The Exchequer.

 “When the government withdrew all state-funded, gas-guzzling limousines from the Royals, there was such an outcry of horror from them. We bought a fleet of brand new cycles! Brand new bikes! They are still untouched I have heard, HM actually requested a motorcycle for the heir to the throne to get about on, but he declined it in favour of the old bike he has ridden in private for years.”  Said the Minister for Transport. “The horses that draw the carriages are getting on a bit now, it would cost a fortune to replace them.”

   “ President Obama is arriving soon on an official visit, I don’t suppose we could negotiate a return to royal duties before then. It would be a shame to lay out the red carpet and the Royals boycott the occasion.” Said the PM.

   Just then a voice broke in from the back of the House. “What about giving the Royals the concessions they are asking for and bringing them back. My Mum would be happy to pay more taxes to fund some appropriate transport for the Royals!”

    There was a shocked silence at this form of blasphemy from within the ranks. “Pay more tax? Are you mad? We are already the most heavily taxed country in the world!”

  Then with a fusillade of shots from a ten gun artillery salute, the cry went up. “It’s all over, the Royal Walkout is finished,  they have come into money.

A Royal windfall on the lottery their numbers have come up.

A Butler has sold Buckingham Palace to a very wealthy Russian he met in Trafalgar Square. An absentee landlord, who has promised to let the royals live in the palace,  rent-free for the rest of the dynasty.

A nephew of HM has become a highly paid professional footballer and has solved the transport problem,

There were cheers and shouts of joy throughout the land. A public holiday was declared, and there were street parties held throughout the length and breadth of the country.

Copyright © Written by John Yeo ~ All rights reserved.

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “LOVE AT FIRST FIGHT”

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “LOVE AT FIRST FIGHT”
Posted on February 27th 2016 by John Yeo
A prompt response for Inspiration Monday

Inspiration Monday: Love at First Fight

PLAY YOUR CARDS RIGHT

by John Yeo

     The ship had sailed away from Southampton on a long voyage to the Caribbean. I have never experienced this type of holiday before, and I was  keen to find a way to pass the time during the interminable days at sea.

    “I think I would like to learn Bridge,”  I said to the Social Hostess, when I went to collect my copy of the morning crossword puzzle and the quiz. “I have never played the game before and it will be a rewarding way to kill some time while we are at sea.”

    “That’s a good idea.” Said, Angela the friendly crew member on duty. “Just turn up and introduce yourself. It doesn’t matter if you are an absolute beginner, the Bridge tutor is friendly and you are certain to fit in.”

      “Thanks Angela, I will let you know how I get on.”

   I was early, for the Bridge session and I made my way outside on deck to sit and do my crossword. This was definitely wistful thinking as I soon became aware of the gusty winds outside on deck. The ship was miles out at sea and the waves were high rolling, and foam topped. The view on all sides of the ship was exactly the same, broiling grey-blue waves on a moving sea reaching out to a far distant horizon. The cloudy sky was broken by a few patches of blue, revealed by the wind-blown clouds racing across. I was astonished at how few seabirds there were, until one of the crew informed me that the birds were usually seen close to the shore.

    The only visible thing was a distant spot on the horizon, I asked my new found friend the crew member. “Is that another passenger ship in the distance?”

    “No Sir, that is probably a container vessel, on the way to the docks.”

   “However can you know what that is from this distance?  I asked.

   “Ah! We only usually see cargo vessels on this route, if that was another passenger ship the Captain would have informed everyone over the loudspeakers.”

   “Thanks for your help.” I said.

     “You are welcome!”  Was the friendly response“

  I made my way to the card-room where I was full of questions. Would I like this mysterious card game? Would I be able to pick the basics up quickly enough to be able to take part in a serious game? The Bridge tutor bustled up to me as soon as I entered, a friendly looking, middle aged lady with piercing brown eyes, looking over a pair of brown plastic spectacles, smiling broadly she said.

     “Good Morning, and welcome have you played this game before? I’m Cheryl and this is my husband Bill. What is your name?”

     I was overwhelmed with the warmth of this friendly greeting, and as Bill shook my hand, I replied. “I’m John, and No! I am an absolute beginner. I would like to learn the basics to enable me to play when I return home.”

   “Of course John, welcome!” Said Bill, “You have come to the right place, luckily we have three people here who are looking for someone to make up a four, let me introduce you to Jen and Lew, and their travelling companion May.”

  I shook hands with Lew, a tall portly man, with a bald head and a friendly manner.

      Jen responded with a welcoming smile and said, “Sit down, John.” I liked Jen instantly, her dark hair and very brown eyes gave her an open but wary look.

    I smiled and nodded as I took a seat at the table, opposite May. “I’m sorry to say that I am a total beginner, I have never played this game before.”

  Lew responded and said, “Don’t worry Jen and I have played a little before, but May is learning, you are welcome to join us.”

  Cheryl bustled up towards our table and said. “May I suggest that you play men against ladies that will put one absolute beginner, up against another, together with one of the more experienced players?”

    I found myself paired up with Lew against Jen and May. Then total card war broke out as the game began. Closely followed and supervised by the two tutors, Cheryl and Bill. I have never experienced a card battle like this before. I found myself getting exasperated looks from Lew as I bidded wrongly and made many amateurish errors. I could see May was getting by, but she was also overcome by the tension of this fight to the finish.

The ladies won hands down, and Lew was rather peeved, I could see it in his demeanour.

I found myself warming to May, her total genuine attitude, her bright blue eyes and blonde hair, and her smiling personality. We arranged to meet later for tea.

Drinking Camomile tea in the cafe and discussing the philosophy of non-verbal communication, we rapidly fell head over heels in love at first fight.

We never played Bridge again!

Copyright © Written by John Yeo ~ All rights reserved.

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MYSTERIOUS ISLAND (15)

Dr Dickus house“A body suddenly crashed through a plate glass window at the Brigadiers house.”
This cryptic message arrived as the raid on “The Jumping Frog” commenced. The team were waiting for a signal from the Brigadier via Marg, when news came that his deputy Colonel Tom, would take command. Tossing grenades to create a diversion, the attack began. Dickus was located in a penthouse and detained, six guards were slaughtered as Bella’s squad attacked.
Marg cuffed Dickus and left the building with Bella, boarding a helicopter piloted by Colonel Tom. Dickus was chained in a warehouse and left in the care of Bella.
Colonel Tom and Marg urgently flew to the Brigadiers house, there had been a raid by Police Commandos using ropes to smash their way in through the windows.
They located the Brigadier and whisked him off in the helicopter to safety.
Then came devastating news, Dickus had escaped, killing Bella and the guards.
A message painted on the wall in blood…………..

(150 words)

Copyright © Written by John Yeo ~ All rights reserved

A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “DIURNAL DREAM”

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “DIURNAL DREAM
Posted on February 20th, 2016 by John Yeo
A prompt response for Inspiration Monday

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DIURNAL DREAM

by John Yeo

        “I tell you we all do it!  All we have to do is keep straight faces. Try not to laugh out loud will you, they will never understand. I will put the ideas together that you provide, and take the credit, yet we both know they are your ideas, not mine or perhaps they are a mixture of both.”

 This was expressed by the visible side. The aspect that was responsible for the germination expression and growth of the ideas generated by the combined power of both sides of the equation that was very briefly present for a few microseconds at dawn, and a few microseconds at dusk.

        “OK! If the nocturnal variation stays within the parameters of the night our diurnal dreams can be continued throughout the night. The nocturnal part of an idea is just an ongoing variation, the end result of a diurnal dream continuing throughout the period when the physical side is prone, asleep and inactive.”  

   The visible ongoing diurnal aspect of the double equation pointed out.  

 “There is an aspect of this coming together. The ultimate coming together to bring the two aspects of a dream into a single entity, that is largely unnoticed and usually ignored and this is the period of diurnal dreaming that takes place when both sides are incredibly bored. Take the average mind wandering away from a droning vocal rendition of obvious facts that are getting relayed and replayed continuously. As in the following…”

 

DIURNAL DREAMING

by John Yeo

The lecture was long and intricately constructed,

Of facts that had been stitched together again.

In a cycle of repetition to set the mind drifting

Looking out the window at the pouring rain.

I like the look of the flaxen haired girl on a cycle,

I believe there is life on the other side.

Would you believe if the world was two sided

Dreams could be split in two.

 ~

The culmination of the interpretation, is that

Dreams are an ongoing fantastical spread,

Of nocturnal desire flooding diurnal dreams

With ideas that could never be shattered.

That girl with the flaxen hair has become

A part of my personal individual stream

In a world that is very well grounded

She is now a part of a diurnal dream.

 

Copyright. © Written by John Yeo ~ All rights reserved

A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “THE SNARK AGES”

A prompt response for Inspiration Monday

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A prompt response for Inspiration Monday: “The Snark Ages”

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THE SNARK AGES

by John Yeo

   Today I am going to steal something from you my patient readers on a timescale of microseconds this will feel painful. Each microsecond will be as valuable as each of the preceding microsecond, an infinity of time to the little known elusive impossible snark.

  Our story begins with a puzzle, when a For Sale sign was removed from a suburban house.

  A little later, the dustmen started to remove the rubbish from the side of the house.

 

  Rumour had it that the house was sold to a mysterious couple, who the estate agent never actually met, the house was purchased by an agent acting on their behalf, who professed never to have met his clients. The owners moved in, in the dead of night, and no one saw them arrive.

   The only clue they were there, was when the dustmen collected the trash.

 

  The couple settled into the neighbourhood very well, or so they thought, but strangely they had no contact with the people on either side of their house. The people on the block never saw a sign of them, not even a hide or hair of them, not a whisker. The full dustbins were always removed then re-filled again by the unseen mysterious occupants.

 

   The curtains were always firmly closed but no-one ever saw any of the occupants. One day Bronson Williams and his wife Louise tapped nervously on the door to introduce themselves and make them feel welcome. No response, Louise left the flowers she was carrying on the doorstep and  they gave up and went home. Three days later the flowers were still there and the dustmen came and emptied the bin, with no response from within.

 

    Charlie and Cherise on the other side of the mysterious house, then tried to get a response from the back door, Charlie banged loudly without success, there was no response. The blinds were tightly drawn and Cherise tried to peep inside without success, the place seemed to be quite deserted, they left the flowers they had brought on the back doorstep and returned home.  There was a bouquet of rotting blooms on the front doorstep. Three days later the flowers were still there when the dustmen came and emptied the trash.

 

    Four days later a For Sale sign went up and several people were shown around the house by an agent. The owners were nowhere to be seen, eventually the house was sold and a young couple moved in, the neighbourhood breathed a sigh of relief as a sense of normality returned.

   The refuse began to be collected again. There was no forwarding address for the occupants as there was nothing to forward.

 

   The culmination of this mysterious tale lies in the microseconds it needed to read it. Each microsecond added to another microsecond eventually becomes infinity. This is known as the elusive mysterious, snark ages.

  At the beginning of this tale of decaying refuse, I mentioned I would be stealing something from you my greatly esteemed reader. I have stolen at least five minutes of your precious time.

   To the average well read snark, this will feel like ages.

  I am sure the refuse will eventually be collected when the dustmen return to work from their strike.

Copyright © Written by John Yeo ~ All rights reserved

A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “PORTABLE NIGHT”

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A prompt response for Inspiration Monday: “Portable Night”

PORTABLE NIGHT

by John Yeo

     “Mummy, you really mean we are going to see Aunty Sheila and my cousins down there!” Exclaimed Ruthie, pointing to the toy globe, and spinning it around. “How will we get from here to there?” she asked.

   “Yes darling, we will be going by aeroplane of course, flying from one side of the world to another.” replied her Mum.

  “Mummy, Daddy says they are all upside down over there. Our daytime is their night. how will we sleep?”

  “We will adjust Ruthie, we will have to try to sleep in our daytime here and their night-time there!”

   “What about the bogeymen that only come out at night? Will they be around in the daytime there?” asked Ruthie

   “Ahh! That’s a difficult question darling, bogeymen come in all shapes and sizes, even here at home we have nasty bogeymen that are about in the daytime!”

  “Mummy, stop it! I know when you are joking, you always smile and crinkle your eyes up.”

   “Yes Ruthie, now go to sleep! We have a long journey tomorrow.”

  The next day the family took their seats on a Qantas  Airbus and were soon tucking into some tempting airline food, Ruthie was very excited. “Daddy what time is it there now?”

   “About 9 o’clock at night, they are about 10 hours in front of us over there. You would be in bed there now.”

Soon the friendly aircrew came around to make sure everybody was comfortable, and asked for all the windows to be blacked out. Ruthie was  curious about this as the sun was shining and it was still daytime outside. “Mummy why is everybody sleeping in the middle of the day?”

“Shush darling, people are sleeping, we have to try to sleep now, to catch up with the time where we’re going. The curtains turn our day into a portable night, so we can reset our body-clocks.”

 “Daddy, Where is my body-clock?”

“Shush please!” Came an irate voice from an elderly gentleman in the row behind. “People are trying to sleep. Please be quiet, or I will call the steward!”

  “Mummy, is that what you mean by a day-time bogeyman”

  “Hush Ruthie!” Said her Mother suppressing a broad grin.

Copyright © Written by John Yeo ~ All rights reserved

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A prompt response for INSPIRATION MONDAY ~ “CATASTROPHIC SUCCESS ”

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A prompt response for Inspiration Monday: “Ground Control”

CATASTROPHIC SUCCESS

by John Yeo

   “Bill and Bella have won the lottery!” said Robin enthusiastically to his wife.

 ”What’s that darling? You’re joking! Really how much did they win, I must catch up with Bella. Do you know, she’s my oldest friend, but I haven’t heard from her for months.”

 “I’m not exactly sure how much, Sarah my love. I must try to get hold of Bill too, we were on the golf club committee together, maybe he will have won enough to see his way clear to funding a new clubhouse.”

Sarah smiled as she bent down and patted a passing dog that was on a long lead, “Hello Rexie, good girl, there’s a good doggie, sorry I haven’t got any chocolate today. Hello, Mrs. Perkins! Have you heard the news? Bill and Bella have won the lottery this week.”

 “Have they really Mrs. Edwards, how much did they win? I’m on my way to the church, the Vicar was asking after them last Sunday. I’m sure they will make a substantial donation towards the fund for a new church roof, now they are wealthy.”

“Well Mrs Perkins, I don’t know how wealthy they are, but old Ted, the gardener distinctly overheard Bill say to Bella on his mobile, we’ve won the lottery!”

  “Hello you two!” A tall slim man approached smiling broadly. “I expect you have heard the news, we have two winners in the community, it’s all over the village. Bill and Bella are always saying how the school needs more IT equipment. I am on my way to see them now, I am sure they will make a substantial donation.” Mr Saunders the headmaster, had kept the local school going for years, Bill and Bella were both ex students. “Have you heard how much they have won?”

“No Mr Saunders, no-one seems to know, I expect they asked for no publicity, you can’t be too careful these days.” replied Mrs Edwards.

“That hypocrite who lives at the end of the village, you know, the one who hates kids walking by his house, always running down Bill and Bella’s kids to all and sundry, wants to organise a surprise party down at the pub for the lucky winners. Money does have some strange effects on people.”

David the local postman rode by on his cycle and called out. “There is a traffic jam in the village apparently someone has won the lottery. Who phoned the press? I can’t get through to deliver the mail!,”

Suddenly a police siren sounded, cutting into the normal peaceful calm of the village.

   Mrs. Potts a matronly lady dashed up to the villagers and said, “Someone has been spreading false rumours about Bill and Bella winning the lottery. Well they only won £25.00 for matching three numbers, chaos has erupted, beggars have come from miles around.”

There was a deafening silence as this astonishing news sunk in among the assembled villagers.

“The good news is, old sourpuss has paid for a surprise party tonight and everyone is invited.”

First a few silent grins, then a snicker and several chuckles, with loud laughter that developed into side-splitting roars of mirth, resounded among the villagers.

Six months later, Bill and Bella quietly sold their house and left the village, never to be seen again. Old sourpuss often wondered about that!

   Especially when some workmen arrived to put a new roof on the church, the golf club opened a new club-house and the local school was completely fitted out with new IT equipment. All down to funds provided by lottery grants everyone said.

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